I Just Peed My Pants

Not really... but almost. The Tampa Bay Rays just signed Pat Burrell to a 2 year, $16 million dollar deal. If you don't know anything about Burrell, he is basically a slightly crappier version of Raul Ibanez, much like Franklin Gutierrez is a slightly crappier version of Adam Jones.

If you don't know who any of those people are, then just think of buying an VW vs. an Audi, or a Toyota vs. a Lexus. The former will cost you 2/3's the price, but you will basically be getting the same thing plus or minus a few bells and whistles.

That being said, this signing eliminates what is speculated to be one of Griffey's top two choices to play next year, as Burrell will most likely DH for the Rays. This leaves Seattle as Junior's next top choice.

Is it to early to predict that Seattle sports will single-handedly be brought back from the dead by Griffey in 2009?

If I buy tickets to opening day at Safeco will I just jinx things, causing the Mariners front office to not sign him, or even worse, him being hurt before the season even starts?

Do I want to shoot myself in the face for writing that last paragraph?

Should I even mention that I broke a mirror this morning?

I'm going to shut up now.

-dunkie

p.s. one last thing... Burrell wasnt resigned by the Phillies because they decided to "upgrade" and sign Raul Ibanez. If Griffey ends up in Seattle because of this sequence of events (i.e. the Mariners not beating the Phillies offer to keep Ibanez in Seattle) it might actually pee my pants.

p.p.s. how pathetic is it that I am actually trying convince myself this is all part of Zdurienik's master plan? Ugh...